felt like crying for absolutely no reason at all? Or just completely giving up after years and years of being strong? Do you ever think that maybe happiness is just a myth? That maybe it's something that we strive for, but don't really get to experience? It's as if right when it's in our reach, when our fingertips are barely able to brush it, it just slips away. Then everything just turns into complete darkness, and you don't know which way to turn or which way to look because you feel as if you have lost all the hope in this world. Everything is just completely shattered...that's how I feel right now.
You guys don't know my background, and I don't like to tell it to very many people. The over view is that my family is lost and very much broken. We don't have anything left to live for but the fact that God will help us through our problems and make everything better. We seem to be going deeper and deeper into this hole, we're trying to find ways to climb out, but the ledge always seems to be out of reach. It's upsetting and tragic to see the ones I love go through all of these problems, but all I can do is pray and hope for the best. I try so hard to be the optimistic one and reassure everyone that everything is going to be fine, that we'll make it. My optimism and my writing. That's all I've got.
Sometimes though, I just feel like screaming at the top of my lungs and crying until I can't even move anymore. Just to let everything go and not be strong for once in my life. Tonight seems to be that night. If I let my guard down though, I'm not sure that I'm going to be able to get back up. And that's also a sign of weakness. I can't be weak, but I just really want to every once in a while.
My second blog of the day. Man. How pathetic am I? I didn't know what else to do to keep my mind occupied. I don't know if anyone will read this, and if someone does, I'm not sure if they will care. But I will still be here, spilling my thoughts out on either paper or too the world. Somehow...paper always wins.
Good Night,
Tabs <3
You guys don't know my background, and I don't like to tell it to very many people. The over view is that my family is lost and very much broken. We don't have anything left to live for but the fact that God will help us through our problems and make everything better. We seem to be going deeper and deeper into this hole, we're trying to find ways to climb out, but the ledge always seems to be out of reach. It's upsetting and tragic to see the ones I love go through all of these problems, but all I can do is pray and hope for the best. I try so hard to be the optimistic one and reassure everyone that everything is going to be fine, that we'll make it. My optimism and my writing. That's all I've got.
Sometimes though, I just feel like screaming at the top of my lungs and crying until I can't even move anymore. Just to let everything go and not be strong for once in my life. Tonight seems to be that night. If I let my guard down though, I'm not sure that I'm going to be able to get back up. And that's also a sign of weakness. I can't be weak, but I just really want to every once in a while.
My second blog of the day. Man. How pathetic am I? I didn't know what else to do to keep my mind occupied. I don't know if anyone will read this, and if someone does, I'm not sure if they will care. But I will still be here, spilling my thoughts out on either paper or too the world. Somehow...paper always wins.
Good Night,
Tabs <3
RSS Feed