Got the blue sky breeze and it don’t seem fair
Only worry in the world is the tide gonna reach my chair
Sunrise there’s a fire in the sky
Never been so happy
Never felt so high
And I think I might have found me my own kind of paradise


Oh goodness, someone please take me to the beach! I miss that salty air like there is no tomorrow! Summer, please come quickly. I would really like to be at the shore of Bodega Bay, sunglasses on, my hair getting sunburnt, and smiling the day away. That sounds nice.

By the way, avocado and oatmeal clay face masks are beyond amazing. I started using it and my skin hasn't felt this awesome in a really long time. I keep touching it since it's so soft. It's addicting. Ladies (and even guys if you would like), do it. You will thank me. Well, at least I hope you do. If you have some sort of allergic reaction I truly apologize. I only meant for the best.

Did you like what I previously wrote? Thought I should share that right along with my love for tulips. Me gusta. Hopefully I'll be expanding my writing knowledge and I will have more to come.

Writing in short blurbs, I know. Need to do some studying but I missed blogging. Thought I should update.

That might actually be it though. Sad, I know.

Do some surfing for me,
Tabs <3

P.S. - I was wrong about the 49ers going to the Superbowl. Never rely on me for sports info.
 
 
Yes please.
Love,
Tabs <3
 
 
    Jamie was sitting on her front porch, with a smile upon her lips. It was a lovely day. The sun was shining through the trees, letting its beams gently settle across the bright green grass. The sky was gentle blue color, as it always seemed to be after a big rainstorm. Birds were chirping as they were admiring nature’s beauty and leaves were fluttering to the ground in the soft breeze. What a gorgeous sight. She took a deep breath and let everything around her sink in. The wooden steps under her were still sprinkled with little drops of water and she could feel them seeping through her jeans. No problem, she thought to herself, I’ll just change when I get back in later. The scenery was just to wonderful to abandon. 

     The wide open space from their countryside farm seemed so much larger when the skies were clear. It gave the feeling that the land was just never ending and that it would take hours to walk from the house to the barn, when in reality it only took a minute. Sometimes she would wander out into the wide open fields and imagine herself soaring above this entire world. What would the view look like from up there? Is it really as wide and big as it seems from down below? She pondered these things continuously. Jamie then slowly stood up and let her fingers find their way into her jacket pockets. She made her way down onto the gravel driveway and listened as the pebbles made a crunching sound under her shoes as she walked. 

     When she got to the only main road that passed by her house, she peered down it in both directions. Not one neighbor in sight and that was how her family liked it. Jamie, her parents, and her three brothers grew up cut off from civilization. When they went to school, it took about one hour just to drive there. It would take longer in the rain since you had to be more careful about the dirt stretches that came out of nowhere and would suddenly make you slide into a ditch. That was a long time ago though, now she was home schooled. It did in fact get lonely, but everything around her kept her mind occupied. Sometimes, their only neighbor who lived about five miles away would stop by and visit for a couple of hours. Even some of her old friends from school that kept in touch would bike the long journey to her house and stay the night. Jamie liked remembering that there were other actual people who lived on this earth other than her family and all of their farm animals.

    Suddenly, a huge mass of dark clouds yet again rolled in and enveloped the entire landscape. Jamie knew that the rain was coming back, and her smile got even larger. She looked toward the heavens and as if on cue, she felt a small drop of water fall on her cheek. It subtly rolled down and was soon followed by another, and another, until she was being plummeted. It felt as if someone was holding a sprinkler above her head. The birds that were hovering above quickly went and took cover, while you could hear the large splashing sound that came from the rain hitting the trees. Jamie closed her eyes, slowly lifted her hands upwards, and held on to this sweet moment God had given her. She felt every emotion all at once. In times like these she knew that although they had no one near them, she was never alone. Everything around her breathed life. She felt comforted. She felt joy. She felt freedom.

Tabs <3
 

Family.

01/20/2012

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Family life can be hard sometimes. Trust me, I know. You can't run away from it because you will then find yourself all alone with a guilty conscience of leaving the people you love behind. You might try to convince yourself that you made the right decision (and some of you might have, not every household is the same and sometimes you just need to leave), but you can't completely stay away. Things tend to pull you back whether you like it or not. There are problems that you sometimes can't handle and you feel stressed beyond belief. Everyone in your household is just acting differently lately and you don't know what to do. Things are changing for the worse. I will give you a personal example.

God granted me the gift of patience and calmness in my family. When you live with hot tempered people and you're the quietest one, it's difficult. I'm small and tend to stay out of the way so my family overlooks me quite a bit. However, I do intervene when needed. Anger and sadness are something I don't tolerate very well, so I don't like seeing it around me. Whenever I hear someone yelling or arguing, I try to help and calm things down. Well, with people who tend to get upset easily, they then blow up on you. This has happened to me before many times. So, by the grace of God, I quietly walk away and take a deep breathe. A couple of years back, I even made plans to leave the state after high school and head to a university. My plans didn't go through and there's a definite reason as to why. I have faith. I pray like there is no tomorrow. I am even beginning to see God's hand answering my prayers and even when things go downhill once again, I keep my head up. God hears us. We just need to be patient.

With patience comes strength. I want to let all of you know that are going through the same thing I am to stay strong. Pray with all of your heart. Having a family is a blessing. Trials and sufferings are something that can't be avoided in this world. Times are tough, but we need to show God that we can trust in Him to help us through these tough situations. They are many people in this world that no longer have loved ones, and my heart goes out to them. If your family is in trouble and you can see things unfolding that are making your heart break, please, don't give up hope. With all your might, keep praying. God hears every single one of your prayers. If you feel He has abandonded you or your family, He hasn't. Let your everyone around you at home see that you believe God will change things. When you show how much faith you have, God will truly see that you are leaving everything in His hands and He will then take control. Everything will be okay.

All of you families out there, I have a simple message for you. Love one another. Parents, be there for your children when they need you most and even when they don't. Stay by their sides. If they don't listen to what you say and are stubborn, keep them in your prayers. Don't let one day pass that you don't pray for your entire family. Read the Bible with them everyday to strengthen their faith. Kids and especially teenagers, respect your elders. Let the beauty of God shine through you when you're at home or with your friends. Watch your words continuously when talking to your parents. They aren't something that should be toyed with. They love you and you should love them. If they don't pay attention to you much, then pray for them. If they yell alot, tell God. He will help you. Encourage each other. Most of all, pray together. I'll leave you all with a wonderful verse that I hope gives you happiness and that you all can abide by.

1 Peter 3:8-9
We will honor each member of this family as God’s special gift. Live in harmony with one another; love, be sympathetic, compassionate and humble…bless one another so that you may inherit a blessing.

Have a wonderful day,
Tabs <3
 
 
I have this weird addiction to Sour Patch Kids. These incredibly wonderful gummy children make my mouth water and I mean that in a very non-creepy way. However, the odd thing is I only crave them when I go to our local 99 cents store. I can be at any supermarket in this entire universe and overlook them, but when I'm there they somehow end up in my basket at the checkout line. They also tend to be devoured on the walk home which means that I'll be craving them once again a few hours later. It's an ongoing process that's a little disturbing.

My shirt smells like my perfume which is called Blossoming Romance. Feel the love.

I start school next week with only two classes. I feel like screaming with sadness like a disturbed 5-year-old. The other two classes I seriously wanted haven't opened whatsoever, and the possible English class that I could have had also went down the drain. They all went down the drain, but not only that, they got clogged there like huge glops of toothpaste mixed with cat hair. It's a huge mushy mess.

Enough of the grossness from this life, let us lighten things up.

The 49ers are going to the Superbowl. This actually made let out a "Seriously? Well isn't that just cool." Being a native Californian and loving San Francisco to no end, I was somewhat excited when I heard this news. Not that I watch football on a regular basis or anything (or barely understand it), but it seems like they haven't made it that far in a while. I don't even know who they are playing against. Sad, I know. I'm more interested in episodes of The Next Iron Chef or the Australian Open which is currently happening, by the way. Roger Federer, you may need a haircut, but you're pretty snazzy in my book.

It's raining outside. Finally. Thank you Lord! You truly are amazing.

-Tabs <3
 
 
I hate that chocoate bars show your calorie intake. I'm already feeling bad about myself for eating it, and now you want to insult me with how much fat I'm also injesting? Companies need to start thinking about different types of marketing techniques, which includes leaving out this information. If you want to find out the nutritional facts, they should have a website you can go to. If not, thank goodness and let me eat my sweets without guilt being involved. Here is what should be put there instead:

Serving Size: The entire bar, of course. If we would want you to eat something smaller then we wouldn't sell it to you like this.
Calories: We took out the calories and replace them with lots of love.
    Calories from Fat: There's fat in chocolate bars? Since when?
Total Fat: Didn't we just go over this?
Cholesterol: A couple bites couldn't hurt.
Sodium: We believe this has something to do with salt. That is all.
Total Carbohydrates: Your body actually needs a bunch of this stuff so it can keep working properly. You're eating the right food.
    Dietary Fiber: Not much, but enough.
    Sugars: A little to much, but satisfiable.
Protein: There's actually some of this amazing stuff in here!

That about sums it up. If you think something should be changed or added, feel free to pitch in. I'm always ups for a good laugh.

Being an occasional writer, I always wonder what it would be like to actually have something published one day. Would it be a novel or some sort of essay? Or would it be a poem that would end up in an amazing book that I would see on the shelf of Barnes & Noble? Would whatever I wrote be taught to children or would a girl from a university be reading it on the front steps of the library? I wonder a ton. My mind reels from even the slightest thought of seeing something of mine published in a book store or sitting on someones shelf. However, only God knows what my future holds. I try not to preoccupy myself with what will happen ahead of this time, but concentrate more on the present. Everything that is going on right now is much more important than what is in the past or what will happen. I like leaving God in control, He's much more understanding about this world.

I will now announce the date for my baptism which will be February 26th. It will be awesome and one of my close friends as church is also getting baptized with me. Woo hoo! Excited can't even begin to describe it. Nervous? Yes, I believe so. But nonetheless, very happy.

Alright time to do some relaxation before heading to sleep. For example, watching Flipped while drinking out of an old fashioned Coke bottle. Also trying to get over the fact of eating that entire IKEA chocolate bar. The regret started overcoming me when I saw the nutrition facts. I still stand by what I said earlier and they should be taken off. People would feel way better about what they eat. Sort of.

Delicious flavor,
Tabs <3
 

Lovely.

01/10/2012

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There's always that one song that makes you want to cry, laugh, and smile all at the same time. It hits you somewhere that you never knew existed. To you, it's beyond amazing. You can feel it flowing through you as you continuously listen to it. It brings a different type of happiness that you haven't felt before and it comforts you in ways that you honestly can't explain.

Music can do this, but not all music. There's a specific type of rhythm that curves to everyone's liking. I mentioned in a previous post a while back that music is a total constant. It is everywhere and in everything. Sometimes though, you find that one song and you just can't get over it, no matter how hard you try. However, some might not even try. The song is so perfect that it's just unexplainable. It grabs your heart and takes you on an adventure while you're listening to it. It pushes some sort of button deep inside that releases a realization that somehow, in a way, you're free. Music can do this. Some of you might agree with me and others won't, but I believe this is true. There doesn't even have to be words to the song. As long as you think it's beautiful, it's yours.

I found my song.


I'm not sure I can truly tell you what I felt after hearing this piano solo. As I'm typing, I'm currently listening to it for the millionth time. I don't understand why I fell in love with this song so easily, and I honestly don't care. It's amazing. For some reason, it brought back a ton of memories and today was the first day I heard it. I thank Pandora for that fact. The more I play it, the more I smile. It's just that simple but at the same time, it isn't. Nothing is simple, especially when music is involved. This to me, however, is pure bliss. It makes me want to be creative. It makes me want to paint and sing. It makes me want to write like I've never written before. It makes me grin. It makes me want to be graceful. It makes me teary. It makes me feel.

If you found your song, relish in the fact that you have something that close. Be happy. However, if you haven't found it yet, you will. I know you will. And that moment will be so amazing, you will come right back here and share it with me. Right? Of course you will. I hope.

Have a wonderful night,
Tabs <3

 

Achoo!

01/09/2012

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With a fever of about 101 and an incredibly sore throat, I can truly say that I am sick. I feel like pudding if that makes any sense at all. I was doing so well too! I actually haven't been sick since the end of last September. However, when my dad caught this horrible plague, I knew it wouldn't be long until I would also be coughing up phlegm (I hate that word) and chugging down an abnormally large amount of tea. I will definitely get better by Wednesday though, which happens to be my best friend's birthday. We will frolick in the downtown area with all the ginormous buildings and I am also taking her somewhere special. She actually doesn't know it yet and hopefully she doesn't read this before Wednesday. If she does, well then Kels, I will refuse to tell you so don't even bother texting me repeatedly wondering where this mysterious place is. I refuse to give in.

While sitting here dying in my ever so wonderful bed, I got to thinking about the amount of peace one is surrounded by when they're left alone to think. There are millions of thoughts that go through a person's mind everyday, yet have we ever just tried to stop thinking so much for once and enjoy the simple peace that's around us? I mean sure, even thinking to yourself that you should stop thinking is still technically thinking (sorry about the repitition, hang in with me here) but it's not thinking as much as we normally do. In other words, put the stressful thoughts aside for just a few moments and thank God for everything we already have in our lives. Even thank Him for the peace that He so graciously grants us. We may not take advantage of it all the time, but every once in a while we should. Without a doubt.

For the next couple of days, try taking in a few moments to yourself to enjoy this peaceful enviroment. If you're in an enviroment that isn't peaceful whatsoever, then get away somewhere that is less distressing. Even if it's to your car in the garage or hiding in your closet, it will be so worth it. You will thank me. Well, at least I hope you will. If not, then I'm sorry and you have full permission to call me a sewer swinging slime ball.

I have a feeling it's going to be a long night full of sniffling and Charlie Chaplin re-runs. I should also like to inform you guys that I have found the Pizza Planet truck in both Wall-E and A Bug's Life. I feel so accomplished. If you have no idea what I'm talking about and are currently furrowing your brow trying to figure out what I'm even saying, then just pretend you never read that. 

Mmmm soup,
Tabs <3

P.S. - I tend to mispell words a lot in my blogs. I apologize. Trust me, it bugs me just as much as it bugs you.
 
 
I don't remember most of my childhood. I do know, however, that it mostly consisted of playing tackle football with every guy in the neighborhood, climbing trees, getting bruises, eating worms (not real worms silly, I mean gummy worms) or sitting in my room, immersed in some sort of book. I was a tomboy with a bad attitude and a craving for literature. Not your average munchkin, I assure you. There is one instance I remember though in my vague memory of childhood that I will most likely never forget. It included my best friend Kelsey, some chickens, and paralyzing fear all rolled into one. Here it is from our childlike point of view...

The bell rang, which could only mean one amazing thing for every kid who was already clutching his/her backpack with anitcipation. School was out. Before I could even begin to shove my things in my bag, I was being trampled by my classmates who could already taste the freedom of being released. It was as if they had been caged against their will for eternity and were finally getting a moment to go out in the open. Stupid heads, I thought to myself, you're still going to be back here tomorrow. I quietly put my addition and subtraction math homework into my bag, hating it with all of my being and also trying to conjure up some way to avoid it. My stomach growled and I realized I woudn't make it five minutes without some form of food. I needed to get home and fast.

As I walked out of class, I soon felt Kelsey by my side. We have always been two peas in a pod since kindergarten and nothing could stand between us. While we were making our way to the classroom where her mom worked, we spotted Chase, the boy who had a serious crush on Kels. Every third grader knew he liked her. I mean, he even chased her into the girls bathroom where no boy has ever ventured into. That was intense stuff. She quickly switched sides with me so she was hidden by my backpack and we half ran so he wouldn't spot us. It worked.

We got to her moms class and were about to say our farewells, before I had a beyond brilliant idea. She should come over to my house. That way we could both avoid homework and run around my neighborhood screaming with happiness at the top of our lungs. It was perfect. My mind was forming this plan at rapid speed and I knew for certain it would be full proof. I told her what I had in mind, we both ran in to ask her mom for permission, we begged and pleaded with a cherry on top, and soon enough we were on the long walk to my humble abode. We skipped and sang, not knowing the horror that awaited us.

My house is a decent size, but unlike all of our neighbors, we have a huge backyard. You could hold a soccer game at one end and a BBQ party at the other. It was amazing and my little brain absorbed it like a sponge. We also had another thing that our neighbors lacked. We owned chickens.

Kelsey and I arrived home. We immediately threw our bright pink bags into my room and made a dive for the fridge. Food was a necessity before a long afternoon ahead of nonsense, laughing, and tackling each other. While eating, I stared into my huge backyard and spotted the chickens. I realized that Kels had never been into the chicken coop before and thought, well, why not give her a tour? I've been in there a bajillion times anyway. So with full tummies and finished juice boxes, we ventured toward the coop.

The coop itself is kind of like a small shed and to the left of it, there is a little pen where the chickens go out and peck around. The pen has a moderately high fence so they won't get out. I opened the door carefully to the chicken coop and showed Kels where the chickens lay their eggs. We grabbed the remaining ones we saw and were having a pretty great time with all of this. As exciting as it was, we also wanted to visit the chickens who were out in the pen talking amongst themselves and enjoying the gorgeous day. We made our way back there and all of a sudden, the door slammed shut behind us. I quickly tried to open it back up but it wouldn't budge, the door was jammed. I slowly turned back around and I could tell something was wrong. A deadly silence took over and we soon realized all of the chickens were advancing toward us. We back up into the side of the shed and could only feel one thing: fear. I looked for an opening but it was useless, there were to many of them and they were coming toward us fast. All of a sudden, I see Kels sprint over a line of chickens and I immediately followed. We weren't out of the clear yet, the chickens were full on chasing us! Their savage beaks were right on our heels as we were screaming bloody murder, knowing there was a very small chance of getting through this without being ripped to peices. From out of nowhere, we remembered the fence and latched onto it with our tiny fingers. We clawed our way up and fell onto the other side, limbs and part of our dignity still intact. As soon as we landed, we both stared at each other, thinking the same exact thing.

We're alive.

Have an awesome day!,
Tabs <3
 
 
I hate the fact that college classes get filled so quickly. My registration time was already pretty late anyway and that fact that people literally devour any chance of having a class early (even if they really don't care about it, it's the satisfaction of getting in that counts) leaves me to believe that it's going to be about ten years before I even get my general education. I feel like punching something. Last semester I was only able to tackle down two classes, and once again I have only been able to get into two classes I actually need this semester. I'm contantly checking everyday to see is two other classes have opened that I actually need but hope is fading fast. I'm getting to the point where I'm planning just to show up to class on that day and hope I'll be one of the students picked to stay there. Sounds like a good plan that will most likely fail. Help me.

Besides having high-in-the-sky hopes about college students dropping out of their classes, winter break is slowly coming to a close. Well, I actually have until January 23rd before this becomes true but I know I'll be heading to school soon before to find out where my only two lame classes are. And also track down the ones I want to get into. I know, I'm desperate. Feel free to pity me.

By the way....drumroll please.....this is my first post of 2012! WOOT WOOT! Sorry, I had to let that out. How was everyone's New Year? I hope it was fantastic. I hope you lit a ton of illegal fireworks and sang the lyrics wrong to your favorite song. I also hope you felt completely embarrassed after you did that. Next year (or hopefully some year very soon), I hope to be standing in the middle of Time Square, the lights blinding me, being elbowed in the face by so many people, and watching that ball drop at midnight. Yes? Sounds like a great plan, right? I think so. Maybe not the elbowing in the face but everything else sounds amazing. And also hopefully meeting YOU. That's right. You. You and that pretty face of yours.

With New Years and break almost gone, all that is left is working on some teenSMART package to get a discount on car insurance. I don't have enough words to desribe how incredibly dull and boring this thing is. Due to lack of computer knowledge, I also get to do the "Parent Participation" part for my dad. Check on me in about four days to make sure I haven't lost my sanity. It would be much appreciated. Other than that, I hope you all are having a wonderful day! Also, if it's raining where you are, thank God with all your heart. We're missing it over here in California. Tragedy might strike soon, and not in a good way.

-Tabs <3